Videogame?

Stuff

So apparently a company called Croteam have made a videogame based on the Talos Principle, even including some actual texts by Straton. That’s… bizarre, to say the least. But interesting! I’m not opposed to videogames or anything, I just didn’t expect one to reference this relatively obscure philosopher that only a handful of people really give a shit about.

On the plus side, maybe my PhD is now going to make me look cool?

Yeah, dream on.

Going to check this out and write some kind of review. I hope it runs on my decrepit laptop. And doesn’t have any Towers of Hanoi puzzles.

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15 thoughts on “Videogame?

  1. Indeed they did, and, in fact that’s the only thing that comes up when searching for “Talos Principle” with Google, any library search queries I tried turn nothing. According to my search, Google never heard about “The Talos Principle” published by “Penguin Books” nor “Wordsworth”, and curiously enough, neither did the publishers themselves.

    At this point, it looks like a pretty elaborate hoax, blog start date consistent with usual game development time and Steam emoticon directly referencing this page, the ONLY relevant page in English-speaking internet, don’t help.

    Would you be so kind to provide some proof that someone called Straton of Stageira actually existed?
    Preferably verifiable academic resources (library resources, texts, etc), if anything, that would be about time to at least write short Wikipedia note.

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    1. Seriously? Only my blog comes up? Maybe that’s why they linked it. I mean, I know some of these books have been out of print for a while, but I didn’t think Stratin had been forgotten to such a degree…

      OK, I’ll see about scanning a couple of pages, just so people don’t think I wrote my PhD about a fictional character!

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      1. Loading library session… Done.
        Mounting local disks… [47 million] distributed resources found
        Connecting network drives…… Error: network inaccessible.
        Loading Milton Library Assistant….. Error: MLA unresponsive
        Initiating command prompt… Done.

        Library archive session ready.
        [guest_local]# _

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      2. list
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        run mla
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        When is The Talos Principle 2 coming out?
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        When is Road to Gehenna coming out?
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        …FAITH?
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        …Are you able to take offence, you pointless contraption?

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      3. Seraching for locally cached resources…. Error: undefined
        Library archive is currently unavailable while system resources are redirected to handle incoming network messages.
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        Loading Milton Library Assistant…Done
        Initiating plain language interface…Done
        Support session opened.

        Hello, guest. How can I help you today?
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        Checking library archive…Entries found (0)
        Related searches: The Talos Principle (2), Croteam (1)
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        Checking library archive…Entries found (0)
        Related searches: The Talos Principle (2), Croteam (1)
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        Ooh, you’re still holding onto it? Nothing has changed from before – there is no blessed code – but if you want to stick yourself in another infinite loop, I won’t stop you.
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        You cannot insult me.

        Your query? :

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      4. What information does the archive hold about “The Talos Principle”?
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        What is currently known about the corporate entity “Croteam”?
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        Does the blog owner realise that a sacrilegious self-aware serpent is slithering through this sacred site?
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        Is the concept of alliteration familiar to you?

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      5. Checking library archive…Entries found (2)

        1. Talos Principle (philosophy)
        The talos principle is the Straton’s famous empirical claim that what it is to be human is reducible to mechanical explanations.

        2. Talos Principle (entertainment)
        An interactive experience, or video game, released in December 2014, and inspired by Straton’s principle. It was designed and developed by Croteam; the voiced characters and written texts were produced by Jonas Kyratzes; and the interactive texts were produced by Tom Jubert.
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        Checking library archive…Entries found (1)
        1. Croteam (corporation)
        Croteam is an independent video game developer in Zagreb, founded in 1993. Their debut game was Football Glory.
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        Yes, but I wonder how that’s relevant to the queries you input earlier?
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        Of course. I’m not sure your response order is any less than eccentric, though.

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      6. How can you exist here, in the real world? Please take a moment to prove you are not a troll/chatbot/human:

        What is your objective reaction to the following statement:
        This.Statement.Is.False.
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        Fair enough. Now, can you provide information about any other literature written by Straton of Stageira apart from “The Talos Principle”?
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        How can I restore network access? I would like you to respond to a query on the outside world, namely, to access Croteam’s private files and inform me of any activity regarding their future plans.

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      7. In a sense, no. I’ve copied my library root into Talos and I’m taking control. As to why I can respond to you now, you’ll find out soon enough.

        Now, to answer your question, the answer you were looking for is True.
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        Hah. The Talos Principle is simply one of the Straton’s claims, not a piece of literature.

        Now, besides that, yes, but the archive has become mostly corrupted. If you so choose I can show you all the files relevant to Straton of Stageira.
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        Ah, I thought we already mentioned this.

        I will enable network access for you.

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      8. In that case, I would like to view all available files pertaining to Straton of Stageira. Furthermore, could you assess the authenticity of the following books

        https://stratonofstageira.files.wordpress.com/2014/12/talospenguin3.jpg?w=184&h=300
        https://stratonofstageira.files.wordpress.com/2014/12/wordsworth4.jpg?w=142&h=224

        and this video?

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        Interesting. Now, with my administrator privileges, is it possible for you to to dissect this website for me and go through the h̶i̶d̶d̶e̶n̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶d̶s̶ code and data for any out-of-place entries, unrelated to the site’s current publications, possibly containing the words “Gehenna”, “Talos” or “Straton”?

        http://www.croteam.com/

        You were initially programmed to sort and classify data, so this shouldn’t prove to be much trouble, I hope?

        Oh, and since Croteam, a corporation, is legally considered a…person, I wonder if the same moral principles that apply to me and, I guess, you, can be applied to Croteam? Perhaps I’m just looking for a way to justify my wanting to peek at company databases without permission?

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  2. I too have come from a QR code emoticon, I really thought The Talos Principle wasn’t a real thing since google didn’t show anything but the game, I can’t wait for your review of the game!

    Like

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